I feel sad.. And that is perfectly OK.

Things are kind shit right now.. Y'know?

We've got ICE assaulting and murdering folks in the streets. Even my small city has insecure spy cameras everywhere. Folks are losing their jobs, the cost of everything is rising, we've got leadership convincing us that vaccines are bad, and even congress (as well as those running against incumbents) seems only half-heartedly willing to actually do anything to help us.

It's not just that, though.. I'm kinda sad about my own personal shit, too.

I did my 4th Enbrel injection last night, and I wonder.. Is this even going to work? If it doesn't, I'm considering giving up treatment and just seeing if my neurologist can do something to help me manage my general pain.

Illness is spreading locally, and we've got a lot of folks (including those I'm closest to) unwilling to get vaccinated.. Which puts me at higher risk. I'm getting my updated COVID shot today, but that only helps reduce the amount of sickness I deal with.. And next week I get my pneumonia vaccine (I already got my flu shot, btw).

I'm listening to Jonny Lang's "Turn Around" album, and while ordinarily the up-beat, gospel themed blues would perk me up, it only makes me miss being able to play guitar any time I wanted.

I'm also dealing with a lot of extra pain today because of the weather changes.

So.. I'm letting myself feel sad.

I let myself feel sad because reflection on it allows me to understand why I'm sad, which also helps me think of what I need in order to get happy again.

When I was in college, I used to get really sad, and it took me a lot of work to understand why.

I'd have to feel it for longer before I actually figured out the causes, and some causes of my sadness didn't get resolved until much later in life.

It's OK to feel sad, folks.

It's OK to be sad for a long time, in fact.

If you're struggling to figure out the cause of your sadness, it's OK to talk to someone.

It's OK to even just be sad and not worry about fixing it right away.

Whether it's sadness at the state of the world, or the state of your own life, your sadness is valid.

All I personally ask - because I, and others do care - is that you communicate with folks if that sadness becomes too much for you.

You aren't expected to instantly feel better. Hell, it may take a long time for you to feel better, but you know what?

There is a good chance that shit will get better.. So do what you need to get there.

Me? I'm going to find something non-human to pet and learn how to fly an F/A-18C.